This generational challenge, that some young people stall in a significant way on their “adulting” journeys, is widely apparent. Our communities are full of these situations. I bet everyone reading this can name someone who is currently struggling this way or has struggled in the past.
But it is a strangely quiet crisis. These situations can be more than a bit embarrassing for the young people and families involved, so people tend to avoid talking about them. Even when the situations are apparent to others, no one knows what to say or do to help — and they don’t want to add to anyone’s embarrassment — so the common behavior is that we all awkwardly not make eye contact with the problem.
In addition, I have been struck by the relative scarcity of resources available to help people navigate these situations effectively. I have been happy to find a few genuinely helpful books and thoughtful papers but at a macro-level I have been surprised by the relative lack of serious guidance or published research on the topic.
My sense is that these young people – and their parents and/or other loved ones – can feel quite alone and ill-equipped as they work through these extended, pain-filled periods. In the coming weeks I will be posting a series of observations on the topic of young adults who struggle to gain adult independence. My intent is to add perspective, offer suggestions, stir dialogue, and increase shared awareness that many good and gifted people are working through these challenges.
Anyone who would like to connect with me or explore these topics more is invited to visit my website at www.otoolecoaching.com.
Let’s Use Better Words — Like “Lost In Place”
12/04/2023
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